Iron curtain
You know what happens when there is an away win. The players go over to clap the travelling fans. The travelling fans leave the ground, singing, “E-i-e-i-o up the National League we go”, while the home fans troop off with their heads down and mumbling to themselves. In stoppage time, Buxton Town were leading at Scunthorpe in stoppage time when The Iron were awarded a penalty. Scunthorpe missed the penalty, and the game was over. The Bucks players celebrated, as did the fans. Some time afterwards, it transpired that the referee had abandoned the game due to torrential rain. The penalty-kicker, it seemed, could scarcely see the ball, and the referee called it a day. Buxton are not happy.
Luke fluke
Luke Summerfield was shown red when playing for FC Halifax Town against Southend United at the weekend. Following a corner, the ball drifted harmlessly out of play for a goal-kick. Referee Paul Marsden signalled a goal-kick, but as he put out an outstretched arm to signal it, his arm went into the face of Halifax’s Luke Summerfield. Luke tried to stop the referee’s hand from going in his face and made some contact with the official. The result was a red card. Undoubtedly, the red card will be rescinded. You can see the incident here.
Hamlet ghosting
There was a surprise this weekend when the Isthmian Premier fixture between Billericay Town and Dulwich Hamlet was called off. The reason was that Dulwich Hamlet had three players on international duty. Craig Braham-Barrett, who has the Twitter name CBBNutrition – he presumably plays for Hungary – was one of the players, as was Adrian Clifton; both actually play for Montserrat. There was a third player, Miquel Scarlett, one of Guyana’s stars. Of course, there was some banter from Billericay Dickie fans, who thought Hamlet were scared to face the mighty Essex club. Rumour has it that the three players had started four games for Hamlet between them.
German General
It may have been a disappointing result for Germany on Saturday when they lost 4-1 at home to Japan, but for Chesham United player Ricardo German, it was a good day. The striker notched a hat trick for the Generals as they travelled all the way to Merthyr Town to record a 3-1 victory in the Southern League Premier South Division.
Vegan diet
When the teams came out of the hat for the 2nd Round Qualifying of the FA Trophy, I was delighted to spot Quorn facing Leek Town. Another tie sounds more like a car chase as Carlton Town face Chasetown. Anstey Nomads face Loughborough Dynamo, which might not seem extraordinary until you realise that Dynamo has the first five letters of Nomads. The ties take place over the weekend of 23rd September.
Success on and off the pitch
Farnham Town sit proudly at the top of the Combined Counties Premier South Division, having won their first five games without conceding a goal and having stuck the ball in the onion bag 18 times. It was sheer delight this weekend as they ran out 5-0 winners at Sheerwater. Hot on their heels are the stampeding Jersey Bulls and Guildford City, while Epsom & Ewell prove that ampersands don’t pay as they prop up the table. On the front of Farnham Town’s shirts is the word ‘Pitchside’, which may be confusing if you are a player, while on the back is the word ‘Catch’, which several teams may struggle to do this season.
Percy faith
My favourite game this week was the Bay Plastics Northern Alliance Premier Division clash between Haltwhistle Jubilee and Percy Main Amateurs. Bay Plastics claims to be the North East’s #1 Plastic Solutions Provider, which presumably means not using plastic. This fascinating clash resulted in a 3-1 win to Percy Main Amateurs, which keeps them in third place.
Chatham Town’s run grinds to a halter
With five wins from five games, Chatham Town faced pointless Cray Wanderers last weekend. Chats keeper Bridle-Card was beaten five times as Chatham slipped to their first league defeat in two years. The result will mean that Chatham will be champing at the bit to get their season back on course, although they remain top of the table.
No concessions
I liked the Twitter post last week, which was swiftly amended. “Join us tonight”, it read. “Admission: £15, Kids £2, Concessions £99”. When I was entering a non-league last season, I was queuing behind a man who was being taunted, so it seemed, by his son. “One adult and one child”, said the man when he arrived at the turnstile. “Kids go free”, replied the lady at the turnstile. “How far away do they go?” replied the man, confusing the turnstile operator.