Hashtag to Wembley teams promoted to L1
During my 21-22 FA Trophy trail, I encountered Stockport County at the last sixteen stage. They scraped past Cheshunt 1-0 before comfortably winning 3-0 at Needham Market. In the semi-finals, they faced Wrexham at the Racecourse Ground. In a fiercely contested game, Wrexham’s Paul Mullin scored two goals in stoppage time to send his team to Wembley. Wrexham lost the Final 1-0 to Bromley. However, Stockport County and Wrexham were promoted to League One on Saturday. There’s much more about this in the book From Hashtag United to Wembley. Meanwhile, Needham Market have clinched
promotion from the Southern League Premier Central Division and will play in the National League North or South next season.
Lancashire Hot Pot
There’s nothing like a typical Lancashire derby to whet the appetite, particularly when it is between two typical Lancashire-sounding clubs. That’s why I was drawn to Barnoldswick Town versus Ramsbottom United. Sadly, the North West Counties Premier League game was washed out, so we will have to wait until the 25th of April to find out who wins.
Half-time entertainment
You used to get marching bands at half-time, and now it’s crossbar challenges or eleven-year-olds taking penalty kicks against a 58-year-old ex-professional goalkeeper. However, this looks far more entertaining. What do you think? https://twitter.com/i/status/1777992919842181220
In a spin
The Dripping Pan, the home of Lewes, has always been one of my favourite names for a ground. However, I recently misread a social media post informing the world that there was a game at the Washtub, a word I’ve not heard since childhood. Actually, it was the Washy Hub, where Silksworth Colliery Welfare took on Windscale in a Wearside Premier League game. The result was a 6-1 win. However, the Washy Hub is not Silkworth CW’s usual home ground, and there is no truth in the rumours that they had to sell a field before playing Windscale.
A menacing forward line
OK, so I know no one says ‘forward line’ these days. Outside rights, inside rights and the like have been replaced by number tens, players playing in the
hole, widemen and box-to-box players. For clarity, I’m not talking about chain-smoking miners who are mature crooks indulging in origami. To get back on the subject, Peckham Town have worked wonders to reach the Kent County Premier Division – the team started by a young lad posting a note on a tree looking for players. The club play at the Menace Arena, which is a curious name, but they presumably have some good widemen.
A typical Non-League football fan
I quite like playing with AI now and again. I asked for a picture of a typical Non-League football fan who likes pies and beers. This is the result, although why he bought one larger beer and one smaller beer is beyond me. The consumption of four pies sounds about average, though. We are not obsessed with pies, although you might think so.
Someone sphinx I’m wrong
Last week, we featured the story of Hamad El Selem, who has bought Coventry United, maybe thinking he was now the proud owner of Coventry City. A fan from Coventry Sphinx wrote to us last week to tell us that the number one team in Coventry is Coventry Sphinx, not Coventry City. Would this be the same Coventry Sphinx that have won six League games all season in the Northern Premier League Midlands Division that lost 5-1 to Anstey Nomads on Saturday? Mr El Selem bought wisely, it would seem.
Anstey not getting antsy
With three games remaining, you could understand why Anstey Nomads might be getting nervous. Not only are they striving for automatic promotion 
from the Northern Premier League Midlands Division, but they are the highest-placed non-League side that have scored in every League game this season. Three ‘Towns’ stand in their way – Corby Town, Coleshill Town and Sutton Coldfield Town. The three Towns will be aiming to be the first club to keep the Anstey strikers at bay for 90 minutes.
Like pulling teeth
The Wakefield & District Cyril Craven Challenge Cup semi-final took place last week. It pitted Leeds Medics & Dentists against Robin Hood Athletic. At half-time, the merry men from RHA led 1-0, but they failed to rob the rich as Leeds Medics & Dentists, probably the most unlikely club name with an ampersand, came back to gain a final place. To win the final, they will need to have their fingers on the pulse and show more polish. Now, rinse and spit.
A great awakening
Great Wakering Rovers join Romford in the FA Vase Final at Wembley in May. Like Romford, they reached the final last weekend thanks to a penalty shoot-out win over Worcester City. I can remember Great Wakering Rovers having some tough days back in the 1990s when they were bottom of the Isthmian League with scarcely a point to their name in one calamitous season. It means that the Final will be an all-Essex affair, which literally means it will be out of this world.
O-O-O-O
It’s not too often that two clubs beginning with O face each other. This week saw Oxford City play Oldham Athletic in the National League. As hoped, the result was a predictable 0-0. However, the teams will not meet next season as Oxford City are already relegated. The biggest O v O game next season could literally be Old Southendian v Old Chelmsfordians in the Essex Olympian League. And this is literally the end for this week.
