Steely response
Fans of Sheffield FC, the oldest club in the world, are rightly outraged when Sheffield United are repeatedly referred to as ‘Sheffield’ on Sky Sports Super Sunday or, indeed, in any other situation. Sheffield are 32 years older than those whippersnappers from Bramall Lane who can’t win a game, unlike their neighbours. A waterlogged pitch caused Sheffield’s game this weekend against Grimsby Borough to be called off. Grimsby Borough can’t claim a higher
status than Grimsby Town, as they were only founded in 2003. As for being the oldest club in the world, it does beg the question of who Sheffield FC played in 1857. Their reserves?
It’s not unusual
Newcastle Town’s ground offers views of the club’s Northern Premier League West games, but it also allows you to watch Newcastle Rugby Football Club’s games on its adjoining ground from some places. Last weekend, though, all 389 pairs of eyes were firmly fixed on the football as Newcastle Town beat Kidsgrove Athletic 3-1. By the way, this is Newcastle in Staffordshire, which reminds me of a road sign I once saw that read Stoke 4 Newcastle 1. Underneath, someone had written ‘If only’ in a felt tip pen. Oh, and why the It’s not unusual title? I forgot to mention that Tom Jones scored Newcastle Town’s third goal in stoppage time.
Anagram contest
There were numerous entries in the best anagram of Miro Granjal Martins Pais (see last week’s review). If I have interpreted his email address correctly, John, a man born as recently as 1995, was unfortunately disqualified. His two entries of ‘stupid w**ker’ and ‘pile of shi**’ did not use all the letters of Miro’s name. However, there were excellent entries from ‘Happy’, an Arlesey Town supporter. I am unsure if he copied his entries from someone else, but he offered major plagiarism in rants and Irani anagram – Jim’s sport. Ringworm, who has possibly worn grim, weighed in with several entries, including Iris’s Alarming Tampon Jar, which is indeed alarming, and Jailor Misprints Anagram. Prizes are, of course, on their way to the winners by carrier pigeon.
More anagrams
OK, so we are stuck on anagrams. A couple of non-League club anagrams courtesy of Dbbn (Debbie Bunn?) on Braintree Town Iron Chatter. Try these:
- Own evil toy
- How men pinch Pat
- Deal, the victor (my favourite)
- Send a towel
Pushing up the daisies
It was intriguing to learn more about Daisy Hill, a team from Westhoughton, near Bolton, playing in the North West Counties Division One North. The club, known as the Daisies or the Cutters, which sounds more like a nickname with a cricketing origin, play at their New Sirs ground – a strange name, you will probably agree. Following their most recent result, a 0-0 draw against Darwen, they are sitting two places above the relegation spots. As for the club’s badge containing a rose and a lion in addition to the daisy, we are in the dark.
Cliff’s greatest hits
Basford United led table-topping Radcliffe 1-0 a week or so ago with 25 minutes to play. Managers Morley and Johnson brought on Jude Oyibo, Josh Hancock and Ewan Bange as substitutes. The result? 3-1 to Radcliffe. The scorers? Jude Oyibo, Josh Hancock and Ewan Bange.
Bee Shannon of Histon Reserves Part 3
We learn some fascinating facts in the third and final instalment of Bee Shannon’s sparkling career for Histon Reserves. The Histon Reserves keeper was a young lad called Bob Stopp, an appropriate name for a keeper. Bee married Bob’s sister, Delilah. Amazingly, it meant her married name was Del Shannon, although she was usually known as Deli, which was appropriate as she was a lover of cold meats. Bee scored three goals on his wedding day after getting married in the morning. It was a runaway 10-1 victory over local rivals, Longstanton. Bee retired, having bagged 204 goals for Histon Reserves.
Unbeelieveable.
Who will reign?
On Saturday, Flackwell Heath visited Rayners Lane in a top-of-the-table Combined Counties Premier North clash at Tithe Farm. The two clubs are 19 points clear of third-placed Bedfont Sports. Flackwell Heath won 2-0 to be level on points with Rayners Lane thanks to two goals from Marcus Mealing, although he missed a chance to bag three after making a meal of a second penalty late in the game.
Flying higher
I was delighted to be informed by a reader that Arlesey Town‘s game against Stansted had more significance than one might realise. Yet again, the aeroplane theme rears its head. It transpires that Arlesey Town were founded in 1891, the same year that Otto Lilienthal flew about 25 m (82 ft) in his Derwitzer Glider. Our reader wonders if Otto had a pal in ‘drome. In the Blues versus the Blues match, Arlesey Town took off and won 1-0 thanks to a second-half winner from Isiaq Araba.
High expectations
Exmouth Town are struggling at the foot of the Southern League Division One South. They went in at half-time 0-0 on Saturday against mid-table Larkhall Athletic. The final score was 5-0, with three goals from Levi Landricombe and two from Ace High. If there is a non-League footballer with a better name than Ace, I would like to hear it. I’m off to play my joker. See you next week.
